Posted by: Kathy | April 1, 2010

Easter Memories

Sunday will mark the second Easter my family will celebrate without my mom. As anyone who has lost a loved one knows, holidays are difficult to get through. I remember the last Easter we celebrated with my mom 2 years ago – the pink, green, and white tie dye dress my daughter wore, my son wearing blue dress pants, a white shirt, and a tie. He asked me to take him shopping because he wanted to look really nice for Easter that year. We have some great pictures from that day. It was the first Easter my daughter got to really enjoy an egg hunt. I’m grateful that my mom shared that with her.

Last year, Easter was very low key for us. We celebrated on Saturday as a family because my son went to his biological father’s house for Easter Sunday. It was a rainy Saturday, so we did the egg hunt inside. We didn’t spend long with my dad because my daughter had a really bad cold. On Sunday I went to church with my dad and then out to lunch with him and my husband and daughter. It was a rough day emotionally and physically. The next day I ended up in the hospital because of a bad reaction to a medication I had recently started taking and I felt awful all weekend. But I did my best to hide everything so that the kids would have a nice holiday.

I think back to the Easters we celebrated when my mom was alive. She loved dying eggs with her grandkids and would decorate the house with chicks, bunnies, and eggs. As with every holiday we celebrated, my mom would put her special touch on what she did and made Easter special for all of us. I hope to be able to continue the traditions in the way that my mom did and to make Easter a special day for my family. But I sometimes feel like I fall a little short and that my mom would have done better. My son will be spending this Easter with us, so I hope that the kids have a great day. That is what’s most important to me.

Of course as we celebrate Easter this year, as with every holiday we celebrate, my mom will be in my thoughts and in my heart. I’m planning to dye eggs with my kids tonight, and on Sunday I will tell them a Grandmom Angel story from an Easter many years ago. I can still picture in my mind the Easter baskets my mom lovingly put together for my brother and I, the egg hunts we did together, and how afterwards my mom would always count the real eggs to make sure we didn’t miss any. I remember how my mom loved Cadbury cream eggs. These are memories I hold close to my heart and will share with my kids so that my mom will be with us in spirit.

Happy Easter, Mom. I love you and I miss you deeply. I hope you somehow know that you are always with me.

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