Posted by: Kathy | May 1, 2015

Just Because I Haven’t Written…

Just because I haven’t written doesn’t mean I still don’t miss my mom.

Just because I haven’t written doesn’t mean I don’t look at my mom’s picture every day with love.

Just because I haven’t written doesn’t mean I still don’t cry over the loss of my wonderful mother.

Just because I haven’t written doesn’t mean that I don’t wish my mom was still here with me, with her family.

Just because I haven’t written doesn’t mean I don’t talk about my mom with my children.

Just because I haven’t written doesn’t mean I don’t long to see my mom or talk with her just once more.

Just because I haven’t written doesn’t mean I don’t think of my mom every day in some way.

Just because I haven’t written doesn’t mean my love for my mom still doesn’t live in my heart.

Mom-me Christmas 2007

I love you, Mom, today, tomorrow, always. Thank you for all that you gave to me in life and still do in death with the memories of the time we shared together.

Posted by: Kathy | February 10, 2015

No Matter What

When my son was much younger, my mom often read him the book “No Matter What.” It’s a cute story about how a mother will always love her child…no matter what. The book now lives in my daughter’s bookcase. I read it to her many times when she was little, but now she’s too old and reads on her own. There are just some books I can’t part with, even though my kids have long outgrown them. These are stories my mother read to my children and they remind me of the love she had for her family.

I was sitting here and the words “no matter what” just popped into my mind. I know I’ve been very quiet on my blog lately. My mom has been gone for more than 6 years. I’ve come through those dark, dark days where all I could do was cry. And although each thought is no longer consumed by my mom’s loss, there will never be a day I don’t think of her in some way…no matter what.

No matter what, I will always appreciate everything my mom did for me.

No matter what, my mom’s memory will live on in my heart and mind.

No matter what, I will share memories of my mom with my children.

No matter what, I will never stop wishing my mom was still here with us.

No matter what, I will always love my mother.

So even though I haven’t been blogging lately, my mom is close to me. There are still times I cry for her – something happens and I need my mom. I wish she were here to talk to or comfort me. There are days when I think of how different our lives would be if my mom were still here. My silence in writing does not mean I have forgotten my mom or that I don’t miss her anymore. It just means that I’ve made peace with her death. Peace allows me to remember my mom the way she would want to be remembered, with happiness and love. I still have bad days, but they are becoming less and less.

On January 2nd, I got a tattoo in memory of my mom – a purple ribbon for pancreatic cancer, angel wings in blue (my mom’s favorite color), and the words peace and mom. I’ve always wanted a tattoo, but I never knew what I wanted. Then one day it came to me. A lasting tribute to my mom.

Tattoo 2-10

I wish everyone peace of heart and mind.

Posted by: Kathy | December 8, 2014

One At A Time

You are my mom.
Gone now from this earth,
it does not change a thing.
One mom is all I will have.

I miss you.
Your smile, your love,
all the things that made you who you my mom.
It is what I miss each day.

I did not think I would lose you
so soon in my life.
A lot of years I saw
that did not come to be.

But you are here,
each day with me,
in my mind and my heart
you live on.

One at a time
it can be done
when I think, when I talk, when I feel,
of all that you were and still are.

One at a Time

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